Sunday, February 8, 2009

Art [for Sunday Scribblings]

left: Shekinah | oil on canvas | 2001
right: Blue Water Bottle | oil on canvas | 2000


Art is something I can't not do. I have no choice in the matter. It is an important thing to me, as necessary as breathing. For years I tried to deny my need for art. I tried to ignore it. I tried to heed the unsolicited advice of well-meaning elders who insisted nothing good could come of a career as an artist. I decided I'd try to become a writer instead. Even when my painting professor asked me senior year about my plans after graduation and tried to encourage me to keep it up, I had already made up my mind to relegate it to a hobby. Writing would come first, I believed. How quickly I burned myself out and developed a crippling case of writers block, having relied too much on the pursuit of only one interest.

Writing helps me to keep my sanity, but art brings me immeasurable happiness. When I have a paintbrush in my hand, that is when I truly feel alive. Writing fiction is fascinating because it allows me to create characters and situations, but it distances me from reality. Art forces me to live in the moment. It is what makes my life worthwhile.

It took me a while to realize this. When writing didn't work out, I later returned to school to study interior design because I thought it would be a practical use of my talents. But I often found the rules too constraining. It required me to be far more meticulous and exacting than I am accustomed to. Eventually I realized just how much art mattered to me in my life and I gave myself permission to pursue it, culminating in my decision to go back to school to get a Master's Degree in painting. And my only regret is not doing this sooner.


4 comments:

  1. Hi- Welcome to Sun. Scribblings!
    It's great to read that you have realized how important creating art is for you. Although it took you a little while, there are many people who don't follow their dreams for a much longer time. Good luck finishing your masters. Enjoyed seeing a sample of your artwork as well.

    (I'm an artist who writes.)

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  2. wow - i also studied/went into design because i thought it would be a practical way to satisfy my art cravings.. well, it's not exactly that.. i am sort of wanting to go back to school for fine art.. thanks for sharing your artwork and welcome!

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  3. Thanks so much for the warm welcome, Floreta and Emerald Eyes. I enjoyed reading your blogs also, and I appreciate the encouragement.

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  4. wonderful. i hate that we are taught to think that there is some standard that we must achieve to be able to "do" art. everyone can "do" art = you have proven this!

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